| The UKKK's Konsole Kingdom |
| "...where game-play counts..." |
| 09/11/2009 0330 GMT Konsole Kretins and PC Peons:
October! 05/10/2008 1230 GMT Mini Reviews - Nintendo DS & Wii: New page! 05/10/2008 1230 GMT Konsole Kretins and PC Peons: September, with review of New Internationl Track & Field DS |
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The UKKK (Undisputed Konsole King of the Kosmos) Don't you just love him? Download the classic "Journey to Silius" from the classic NES game: Go! |
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| Konsole Kretins and PC Peons |
| What the UKKK has been playing this month |
| The Polls and The 100 Greatest Games of All Time |
| The best game ever? What do developers play? Check the polls |
| Letters To The Editor |
| The UKKK's letters and questions to various magazines and websites |
| Gaming Racists |
| Editorial endorsing the Konsole Kingdom's gameplay is paramount and anti-bias ethos |
There I was at the Konsole Kingdom getting physically and mentally prepared for the next challenge that awaited the Konsole King when the little Kretins spoke to me. They said get to Carnegie, get to the Bobmart, something's gonna happen to change the destiny of the UKKK. And there you were PC Peons, sly and sleazy as you are, issuing a challenge to anybody in the B-Boy Realm to rise to the challenge. Well, the UKKK came, and he took it aaaallllllllllllllll...."
Well, not quite. The above is one example of what happens when the UKKK pops in on a B-Boy Doomathon (LAN gaming sessions which were initially inspired by Doom2) and starts laying the smack down on their kandy arse. And yes, the silly PC games like Quake and Command & Conquer stop and great Konsole games like the Smash Tennis begins. In fact, as soon as I enter the room, a cacophony of "Smash Tennis" chants is bellowed out as the trusty Super Nintendo is ripped from the clutches of the mighty UKKK
In reality, the Konsole Kingdom was born when one of the UKKK's most anticipated games - F-ZeroX on the N64 - stimulated the energies of the UKKK to write a review. Hence, F-Zero's four main vehicles are pictured above in honour of the game's inspiration. Unfortunately, F-Zero let the UKKK down in a way that no other gaming journalists failed to notice. F-Zero simply lacked some simple, yet crucial options which would have vastly improved it. Things like being able to set the number of laps and lives would have given the game more variety and longevity, and challenge. Whilst not overly easy, it was still easy enough for the UKKK to feel like he needed the extra challenges that these options would have provided. The UKKK was further aggrieved as F-Zero continued Nintendo's long trend of not providing these sorts of options. The review - which covers these too - was subsequently sent to the Nintendojo website and provoked many, many e-mails to the UKKK, all of which were congratulatory and complementary. Read the review and see if you agree. Also, the UKKK's International Superstar Soccer Realm contained reviews of two ISS games, so with three reviews ready and waiting, and with inspiration to possibly write others pending, the Konsole Kingdom was born.
With the dedicated games systems excelling at providing the UKKK's favourite games due to variety, quality and ease and comfort of play, especially in multi-player, obviously most of the reviews are of console based games. But, the UKKK is a games fan first, and indeed has several PC games as well as a network of PC-playing buddies. If either the UKKK or one of his B-Boy buddies feel a PC game needs the Konsole Kingdom treatment, it will get it. The Konsole Kingdom will continue to provide reviews of games across all systems that highlight key areas that the UKKK feels the mainstream media has missed. Yeah!
Firstly, reviews found here have been posted in various sites throughout the Cosmos, including my own sites, and Nintendojo.
All games are graded in Gameplay, Control, Graphics, Sound & Overall. Lastability, replay-value and things like fun-factor are generally not graded, as really, these are totally subjective areas according to gamer's tastes and experiences. Of course, they will be taken into account in marking Gameplay and Overall. Specialised fields like Tracks (in a racing game) will be graded as required.
Games are rated in whole numbers out of 10, with "5" being the score for an average game. The UKKK finds it silly how people can be so precise in scoring games when using percentages and fractions, especially when these scores are not even part of an equation or average. In marking the game, the total mark is in fact the Gameplay mark with the Control mark affecting it slightly. Basically, how the game plays is exactly how it is rated. This is what the numbers mean:
The Overall mark is reduced when periperal aspects like sound, graphics, lastability and options are clearly not up to scratch, as evidenced by the F-ZeroX review. Games don't get "bonus" overall marks either for these things unless it truly is derived from programming excellence, such as Donkey Kong Country on the SNES and Top Gear Rally's (N64) paintshop, and not just a result of new hardware. Or it could be from multiplayer options that significantly transform a game as evidenced by the Bomberman series, or even Quake, in the PC world.
Finally, games are re-reviewed months later to see how long-term factors bear out. These re-reviewed games are tagged with a "*".
Any comments or mini-reviews, or even full reviews are welcomed.
Email the UKKK at:
Where you will find areas devoted to all this!
The Konsole Kingdom has been on-line since December 1998.