Jesus Christ made the statement in John 7:37-39, that the spirit of one who believed in him would become like a river of living water. But what does your spirit look like now? What has your spirit looked like in the past?

The Russian author Fyodor Dostoyevski published a novel called "Crime and Punishment" in 1866. In the novel, the main character, Raskolnikov, in morbid depression, is contemplating a terrible murder. He has a dream, which is a parable dealing with the nature of evil. The following is an abridged account of that dream.

THE PARABLE
There was a boy walking along with his father, when they came across the following scene.
A small, thin horse was harnessed to a large, heavy cart. Suddenly, a man and his friends came pouring out of a pub, drunk and singing.
He yelled to his mates, "Come on, get in, the lot of you, I'll take you there!"

Instantly a burst of laughter came from the crowd round about.
"That old jade'll never make it!"
"Come off it, Mikolka. Have you lost your brains, or what? Harnessing that little filly to that great cart!"
But the man shouted, "Come on. Get in, I say. I'll fly there at a gallop!" And he picked up a whip, preparing with satisfaction to flog the little grey horse.

And the crowd laughed and joked.
"Go on get in, you heard him - he's going to fly there at a gallop!"
"I'll bet that mare hasn't galloped in ten years."
And the man replied, "Well, she is going to now!"
"Don't spare her lads, get the whips ready to flog her!"
The crowd roared with laughter and cracked jokes, and more men piled into the cart.
And how could they fail to laugh? A wretched little mare like that going to pull such a load at a gallop?

"Giddy-up!" they cried as they started to let fly with the whips.
The little jade began to tug with all her might, but not only was she unable to set off at a gallop, she could barely manage to move forward at all; her legs skittered about under her as she whinnied and cowered under the blows from the three whips that rained down upon her to no effect.
The laughter in the cart and the crowd doubled, but Mikolka lost his temper and began to flog the little mare even harder, as though he really believed he could make her gallop. He lashed her and lashed her until he hardly knew what he was doing in his frenzy.

"Papa, Papa!" the little boy cried to his father. "Papa, what are they doing? Papa, they're beating the poor little horse!"
"Come along, come along!" said the father. "They're drunk, playing mischief, the fools; come along, don't look!"
But the boy broke away and ran over to the little horse. But by this time the little horse was in a bad way. It would gasp, stop moving, start tugging again, and then nearly stagger over.

"Flog her to death!" Mikolka cried. "I'll do it myself!"

An old man called from the crowd "What's the matter wood-devil? Not got a Christian heart in you?"
Mikolka replied "Leave me alone. She belongs to me! I'll do as I like with her. More of you get in! All of you! I'll damn well make her gallop!"
Suddenly a roar of laughter came from the crowd, drowning out everything else. The little mare, unable to endure the intensified rain of blows, had begun an ineffectual kicking of her hind legs.

"Whip her on the muzzle, and on the eyes", Mikolka shouted.
"A song, lads" someone shouted, and a dubious song broke forth from the cart.
The little boy was beside himself, the tears flowing, hit by a whip but feeling nothing.
"What's the matter with you?" Mikolka shrieked in fury, and pulled out of his cart a thick shaft.
"He's going to kill her!" the shout went out.
"He's going to do her in."
"She belongs to me", Mikolka shouted, and he struck the little horse a heavy blow. And then another, and another blow.
The little horse sunk to her hindquarters, but then leaped up again and started tugging, tugging with all her strength in various directions, in order to get going with her load; wherever she headed, however, she was pounded by blows. Mikolka was in a rage because he was unable to finish her off. So he reached into his cart and pulled out an iron crowbar, and the blows thudded down upon the little horse.

"That's the end of her!" the people in the crowd shouted.
"She should have galloped", someone else said.
"She belongs to me", Mikolka shouted, looking sorry that there was no creature left to beat.

But the little boy was beside himself.
"Come along, come along!" his father said to him. "We're going home!"
"Papa! The poor little horse... Why did they kill it?" he sobbed, but his breathing was choked.
"They're drunk, they're up to mischief, it's none of our business, come on!"

At that point, Raskolnikov woke from his dream. He was shaken by the dream, but now felt that a terrible burden which had been weighing him down for a long time had been removed from his shoulders.

What do you think? Do you think that Raskolnikov committed the crime after this dream, or overcame the desire?

Have you ever been caught in a situation where you could see yourself heading towards doing the wrong thing? You could see it coming. You could feel yourself losing control and you felt powerless to stop it. Like the little boy, you knew something wrong was happening, but like the little boy, you were immature, you were powerless to do anything but watch yourself inevitably do what you knew you should not, oppressed and beaten by your own lusts and sins, even though you grieved that you were doing wrong?

Raskolnikov, shortly after his dream, committed the premeditated, cold-blooded murder of an old lady and her sister. He was overcome by evil, rather than overcoming it (Rom 12:21).

In all the experiences that we have been through, in family, at work, in different churches we have been in, how have we felt when something terribly wrong was happening? What have we done as we've seen crowns of righteousness stolen from helpless sheep (Matt 23:13)?

Prov 23:29-35 Who has woe? Who has sorrow? Who has contentions? Who has complaints? Who has wounds without cause? Who has redness of eyes? 30 Those who linger long at the wine, Those who go in search of mixed wine. (wine is symbolic of doctrine) 31 Do not look on the wine when it is red, When it sparkles in the cup, When it swirls around smoothly; 32 At the last it bites like a serpent, And stings like a viper. 33 Your eyes will see strange things, And your heart will utter perverse things. 34 Yes, you will be like one who lies down in the midst of the sea, Or like one who lies at the top of the mast, saying: 35 "They have struck me, but I was not hurt; They have beaten me, but I did not feel it. When shall I awake, that I may seek another drink?"

One of the things that I am just beginning to see and wonder about because of these scriptures is how have I been beaten, abused and damaged by the people and the world around me, how I've preferred to take refuge in being oppressed and in weakness, rather than in the strength of God, how I have, in the different experiences that have confronted me over my life which I suspected were wrong, responded with a tearful helplessness of a little boy, watching the life being pounded out of a little horse.

Isa 10:20 And it shall come to pass in that day That the remnant of Israel, And such as have escaped of the house of Jacob, Will never again depend on him who defeated them, But will depend on the LORD, the Holy One of Israel, in truth.
Isa 30:12 Therefore thus says the Holy One of Israel: "Because you despise this word, And trust in oppression and perversity, And rely on them,
Isa 51:23 But I will put it into the hand of those who afflict you, Who have said to you, 'Lie down, that we may walk over you.' And you have laid your body like the ground, And as the street, for those who walk over."

Christ was furious with the Lawyers and Pharisees. In Luke 11:46 he said "Woe to you also, lawyers! For you load men with burdens hard to bear, and you yourselves do not touch the burdens with one of your fingers.

Matt 13:13 "Therefore I speak to them in parables, because seeing they do not see, and hearing they do not hear, nor do they understand. 14 "And in them the prophecy of Isaiah is fulfilled, which says: 'Hearing you will hear and shall not understand, And seeing you will see and not perceive; 15 For the hearts of this people have grown dull. Their ears are hard of hearing, And their eyes they have closed, Lest they should see with their eyes and hear with their ears, Lest they should understand with their hearts and turn, So that I should heal them."

Really seeing and really hearing the word of God results in an urgency to be healed. Healed, so that our conscience does not remain immature and weak watching people flog a defenceless little horse. Healed, so that our desires and lusts are overcome as we struggle with the help of God and the exhortation of those who believe they are their brother's keeper. Healed, so that morbid crowds around us do not pressure us with their folly, but rather that we rebuke them.

Then our spirits will be like springs of living water, for the Spirit of God cannot return to him void (Isa 55:11).